Everyday It Will Rain
by WritingFromTheSoul
Summary: Tony thinks about Ziva disapearing. Written during the time period Ziva disappeared, obviously.


**Hey everyone!**

**This was written during the time period that Ziva disappeared. Also written from Tony's point of view.**

**-Vi**

I stared out the window of my apartment, into the pouring rain. The can of beer still sat on the table, unopened. I reached for it, then pulled my hand back. I had been trying to drink it off every night since she was gone. All I got was a heavy hangover the next day.

Didn't make me forget that she was gone.

_Skip it, _I thought to myself. Instead, I reached for the radio. I turned the dial. "Next up: the latest Bruno Mars hit, It Will Rain." The radio announcer cried. I grimaced. _The last damn thing I need to hear right now is some sappy, overrated teenage girl love song, _I thought as I reached for the dial.

_If you ever leave me, baby  
Leave some morphine at my door_

I paused, my hand hovering over the dial.

_Cause it would take a whole lot of medication  
To realize what we used to have, we don't  
Have it anymore_

I leaned back. It didn't sound like a crappy, overly-cheerful love song. Maybe I'd listen.

_There's no religion that could save me_

My thoughts traveled back to Ziva. Even though I wasn't usually a heavy church guy, I had been praying, sometimes for hours, that Ziva was safe. That somewhere in this world, she was still holding on.

_No matter how long my knees are on the floor_

_So keep in mind all the sacrifices I'm making  
Will keep you by my side  
Keep you from walking out the door_

I remember her holding that gun to my chest, screaming at me. She could've shot me, right there. But she didn't. Something stopped her.

I may have seemed angry, but, inside, I was falling apart. Everything came crumbling down, because even though I shot Michael for the safety of our team, it was also out of jealousy. That sleaze bag didn't deserve Ziva.

But did that mean I did?

_Cause there'll be no sunshine  
If I lose you, baby_

I hoped to god that I hadn't lost her.

_There'll be no clear skies  
If I lose you, baby  
Just like the clouds  
My eyes will do the same_

I felt my eyes watering. I didn't try to stop it. I just let them fall down.

_If you walk away  
Every day it will rain, rain, rain…_

Every day it will rain. Well, my life certainly hasn't been blue skies and sunshine lately.

_I'll never be your mother's favorite  
Your daddy can't even look me in the eye_

Her terrible father. He had used her, and Ziva knew it. But she wouldn't say it.

I clenched my fists. _That bastard was killing her, _I though angrily. He hated me because I could see it; could it be possible that he thought that I was softening Ziva?

_If I was in their shoes  
I'd be doing the same thing  
"There goes our little girl  
Walking with that troublesome guy."_

Troublesome guy. Huh, that was me. The bar hopper, the partier, the ladies man. The guy that only seemed to care about beer, parties, and sex.

But I could change. I'd change for her. I'd do _anything _for her.

_I hope to god it isn't too late, _I prayed.

_But they're just afraid of something they don't understand  
Well, little darling, watch me change their minds_

Watch me change everything for her. Watch me amaze the world by becoming the soft, sweet, lover Tony DiNozzo.

The one that no one knew.

_Yeah, for you  
I'll try, I'll try, I'll try, I'll try  
I'll pick up these broken pieces until I'm bleeding  
If that don't make it right_

I'd pick up the shattered pieces, whether it was the shards of Michael's death or the sharp pains of Ray's heartbreaking leave. I'd pick them up until my hands were bleeding, if that made it right.

_Cause there'll be no sunlight  
If I lose you, baby_

"If I lose you, baby…" I found myself softly murmuring the lyrics.

_There'll be no clear skies  
If I lose you, baby_

I began to softly sing the lyrics.

_And just like the clouds  
My eyes will do the same_

_If you walk away  
Everyday it will rain, rain, rain…_

It will rain, every day, until she came back.

**Please Review!**

**Love you all!**

**-Vi**


End file.
